That's Life

So work has been kicking my ass this week. As has my online course. And - to top it all off - my grandma had a stroke yesterday. She's in hospital, but doing well and is being moved to rehab soon. Obviously the latter is what I'm most concerned about at the moment, but I know she's a tough old broad and she's lucid and talking so things are looking ok for the moment.

In any event, that's life. I've realized over the years that life seems to go in cycles. The past few years it's noticeably been a cycle that switches through the course of the year between school and my summer job. But it's more detailed than that. I go through weird periods of time with emotional cycles.

Emotional cycles include those times where I'm overly optimistic about the future and I feel on top of the world. They also include those times where I grow steadily more cynical about the future and I begin picking out names for my future cats. Even at my most cynical though I tend to maintain a certain amount of humour - as shown by the idea that I would pick out names for my cats like Murray cause I think it'd be fun to say - as in Furry Murray.

Anyways - I'm in a weird cycle that is typical of me at the moment though where I yo-yo back and forth between how I feel because I can't decide if my life is going anywhere or not. More specifically - this current yo-yo is linked to the boy as I continue to avoid actually bringing up the subject with the only person who could actually answer my question.

But now - with my grandma in hospital - this other stuff doesn't matter as much and I feel guilty that it matters at all. Funny how things can be put into perspective eh? I usually am pretty good at keeping my perspective, but I do allow myself to get swept away on the high that is infatuation at times. I like to think it's my little dopamine vacation from reality.

So my question is this - do you find yourself also going in cycles of how you feel?